This just in!

We've just recieved this bullitin headline, on some very interesting scientific facts, about life.

Wives.
Scientists have recently discovered, that any man who has ever had a wife, has died. And that this can be traced back as far as the days before Christ.
This comes a major shock to many institutions around the world, as many men out there are indeed married.

"I always had this feeling she'd be the death of me, but I never really believed it"
Says one such spokes person.

After this discovery, "Wives" have now been deemed a natural cause of death, and has become the world wide number one killer, when it comes to male fatalities.
Politicians are even now looking into this increasing problem, and what can be done about it.

Also:

Birthdays.
A recent survey shows, that birthdays are indeed good for you. It has long been speculated that people who have lots of birthdays tend to live longer, but it was not untill some time last week that this was actually proven.

Scientists believe that this new insight will have a massive impact on people's social lives, and expect to see lots of people have birthdays over the next couple of years.


Cheers!
- The Bedlamite